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Author Topic: The Taunting Thread  (Read 55578 times)

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Offline ZWarrior

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The Taunting Thread
« on: May 02, 2002, 12:08:35 PM »
Darkness falls on the city, and the denizens of the night begin to prowl.  Out of the alley a figure comes running, looking back periodically.

The figure runs to the next corner and starts across the street.  A resounding CRACK sounds, and the figure falls to the pavement lifeless, and headless.

  Four stories above, a shadowy figure moves away from the edge, and sheaths his rifle.  "Told him to stay in teh shadows, I don't think Dragon_Master is ever gonna learn."

He moves off into the shadows, searching for other prey.
« Last Edit: August 20, 2007, 09:49:12 AM by ZWarrior »
--------------------------------
Zoë: Shepard, isn't the Bible kind of specific about killing?
Book: Very specific. It is, however, somewhat fuzzy around the area of kneecaps.

Offline Wolverine of Ambush!

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« Reply #1 on: May 02, 2002, 12:25:06 PM »
Wolverine spawns in after a shot from the 'cheap' seats. "Next time I will respond to my senses. I knew I smelled something like PEE..."

It was O-PEE-sliver. He was the new guy to the tournaments. He distracts people with him smelling like urine. If they are distracted trying to figure out 'WHO DUNNIT', he takes that advantage and kills them. You see, O-PEE -sliver... HAS to kill that way. In an open fight he wouldn't stand a chance so he must revert to being 'stinky' after urinating on himself.  

Wolverine goes on the prowl. SPADE spawns in near Wolverine. "Hey Spade! Ready to do some damage? Oh! And watch out for "Mr. PEEE on his Body". Wolverine and Spade are out popping in and out of the atmosphere with there skillful translocating. "Yahooeeyyyy.. This is the way to travel!". Just then Wolverine smells a stench.. Looks over at Spade. "Hey Spade!(whispering) Mr.PEEE body is around here." Wolverine hears something around the corner of the building in front of him.. He sneaks up to the edge and sees.. O-PEE-Sliver Peeing on his shoes..while whistling "Skip..skip..skip to my Lou...Skip...Skip..Skip..to my lou my Darlin." Wolverine steps around the corner with his trusted Flak Cannon and says..."Whistle while you work..HUH?.. Well... it's payback time!" Pulls the trigger of the cannon and *CHAKOOOOOW*... O-PEEE-Sliver falls to the ground, Dead. Wolverine decides to help O-PEE-sliver with his schemes. Wolverine starts whistling to the tune of "That's the way Uhuh...Uhuh..I like it!..uhuh ..uhuh" while peeing on O-Pee-Sliver's lifeless body. ..

Wolverine says. "Lesson #1 Don't mess with the Wolverine!"  

Spade just then lets of a Sniper Round drilling a hole through Dragon_Master's forehead. Wolverine goes over to check it out. "Hey Spade! Nice shot from the hip. How did you get the hole to look like a spade?" Spade responds.. "I upgraded my bullets to the advanced model. And they are copyrighted so no one else can get them." Wolverine says. "But why did you waste it on Dragon_Master?" Spade says. "It added value to his carcass!" (both snickering)  

Spade and Wolverine start dancing to the tune of " 2 legit...2 legit to quit....2 legit...2 legit to quit..."..Spade screams.. "Hammer time"... "You can't touch this!"


"Naner Naner boo booo!"
Class is in Session.  Get ready to be schooled! :hat:

Offline Wolverine of Ambush!

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« Reply #2 on: May 02, 2002, 01:11:25 PM »
It is night time in the murky shadows of a desolate city. Fog hovers through the city square.  

Wolverine states to his new friend in arms, Spade, "I hear and smell someone..just can't get a lock on who it is."  

Spade and Wolverine start traveling through the air with their faithful translocators.    They both stop in the shadows at the end of an abandoned building.

Wolverine says, "Time to fish em' out. I'm going to put a little nacho cheese dip and some nacho chips here in this corner. That will be the bait.. and let's see who comes for it.  Hey Spade? ..I bet you 100 to 1 its Zwarrior."    
Spade replies, " I don't know Wolfy, it could be Rogue! You KNOW how much he loves that stuff."

Wolverine says, "When I'm right, I'll tell you how I knew."

Just then a sound from the shadows.. Wolverine hears a sound like a growling stomach..a BIG one for that matter.  It is Zwarrior and he is slowly working his way to the end of the building.

Zwarrior thinking to himself, "I smell NACHO CHEESE! This BETTER not be a joke."   As Zwarrior gets to the end of the building, he sees the cheese and chips. Zwarrior, while getting closer to the cheese and chips, starts quietly singing, "Hey cheese....Bring back...that loving F-E-E-Ling...Bring back that loving feeling." Zwarrior starts quickly digging in.  

Wolverine says to Spade, "Zwarrior HATES strobe lights, it gets him dizzy and he can't shoot straight...  Watch this!"  

Wolverine shoots out his translocator. It falls right behind Zwarrior. Zwarrior hearing a sound...stops and looks up to get his senses working again.  :|Zwarrior has cheese all over his face and chip fragments falling out of his mouth.  Spade looking from across the street in the shadows starts snickering. :lol   With expertise Wolverine ever so fluidly starts translocating in and out of space and time in a circle around the shadowy area where Zwarrior is standing. Spade from across the street is just seeing flashing of Wolverine translocating and Zwarrior blindly letting off sniper shots. Zwarrior screams, "STOP...I'm dizzy."  Wolverine decides to stop playing with the CHEESE feen and  translocates at the feet of Zwarrior and gibs him.  

Wolverine lets out, "Yahooooooooooo!"  Wolverine translocates over to where Spade was waiting.

Spade asks, " How come you KNEW that it was Zwarrior and he would come for it? "

Wolverine says, "I was watching the learning channel last night.  I learned that the ROACH(roche), loves the shadows and love Nacho Cheese and Chips! So I made a place that only a ROACH (roche) would come to!"8)


:rolling:rolling:rolling:rolling
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Offline Spade

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« Reply #3 on: May 02, 2002, 08:45:17 PM »
MOUSE CLICK, They hit the ground running,
their verbal war of taunts and punning.
Their keyboards become their daily guns,
firing and shooting at these mothers' sons.

Stoically they stood and faced the foe
and watched them in their triumph, go
believing in their desperate skill,
a win provides the sought for thrill.

These hopeful warriors, have hopes to save
countless new souls from an early grave;
And the taunts, rapped-out in broken sounds
of these alien tongues on these proving grounds.

' Watch out, you boys we're the elite' they taunt.
as in the face of death they flaunt.
' We're the best there is' they rib,
and face their foe and another gib.

Their un-broken ranks, seething, stare;
cannot, must not, show they care.
Derision and laughter for those stricken souls,
whose shortened lives yet tell the toll.

Intimidation is their weapon now,
an urge to respond, writ on every brow.
These mothers' sons once were boys
their rifles, once were plastic toys.

Now these killers wear 'Gucci' watches,
'Seiko Kinetic' or the latest 'Swatches'
but, lying prematurely beneath the ground
on wrists, their fashion icons, make no sound.

Their dead wear 'Nike' and 'Adidas' too,
their common denominator, a sportsmans' shoe.
In war then, fashion knows no bounds
so why not learn from these proving grounds?

Will victory reign on this troubled shore?
or persist, as in the days of yore.
History yet will tell again the tale
a hopeful win, doomed to fail?


Old scores to settle, old wounds to heal,
this war, to us, seems hardly real.
Yet, daily, death is dealt by these mothers' sons
by high-tech, state -of -the-art, animated guns.

And we, defended by our skill
continue to win, continue to kill.
Then, as each mothers' son is lost
should we now begin to count the cost?

A cost other mothers' sons will pay
who live to fight another day.
remember when you go to sleep
The price you paid was fairly cheap!

As we the victors of Rogue and Spade
Protect the history we have made
Back to back we fight these mothers' sons
Keyboard wars, animated guns.

And now that Wolverine has joined the ranks
We’ve moved up to planes and tanks.
In Rogue’s absence, Wolverine now fills
The back to back teamwork it takes to kill.

So we call out to all the mother’s sons
Bring your taunts and un-holster your guns.
This ground is ours and won’t be taken
We wont be broke or even shaken

See you on the proving grounds
Gibs and frags make victory sounds.
Remember while you pursue your win
To watch your back, were like the wind

Spade and Wolverine :beer::camera::compute::camera::beer:
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Offline Wolverine of Ambush!

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« Reply #4 on: May 03, 2002, 09:08:11 AM »
Take that!    Naner Naner Boo Boo!:bounce:
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Offline Spade

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« Reply #5 on: May 03, 2002, 11:42:35 AM »
A tribute to game day:gunner:

The alarm clock goes off
A sudden sitting up in bed
The night was short but everything is packed and ready to go
A wipe to the eyes:clap:
Still seeing the 60 HZ wave effect in the mirror but I’m ready
The coffee I set last night before I went to bed is brewing down stairs
I can smell it as I take my shower
The Ambush team should be starting to set up now
Hope we have enough tables for everybody, the signup was the best I’ve ever seen
Hair is dry, have to wake the boy and get him ready to go
He is a lot like me….loves the challenge…the thrill….the friends
7:00 and the truck is packed, had to pull the back seat out to make enough room
A kiss on the check of my loving wife who knows how much I enjoy these days
Her day will come….She will want a shopping day while I watch the kids
Unpacking now….I love it when everybody helps
Zwarrior and Wolverine obviously didn’t shower….My son makes fun of their hair
Taunts begin…..Smiles are many….You can see everybody had little sleep
I love getting there early to pick my table, of course the head table is already full
Seems Zwarrior and Zeet were here last night
Wolverine is taping down the cables as I set up
Have to save a spot for Rogue…Hope he gets here soon
All set up and time to power the UPS…Zwarrior will need one just for his 2 tables
Wow look at the prize table….the sponsors are growing
Here comes some more people the tables are filling up
Zwarrior changes the music….WE WILL, WE WILL, ROCK YOU!
ANOTHER ONE  BITES THE DUST! ANOTHER ONE BITES THE DUST!
One more hour and the games begin
Everyone is already playing while they wait for Zwarrior to finalize the server
Wolverine and Rogue are helping make sure everyone has the maps
Zeet……What a spectator his is…never know when your on the big screen
12 hours will come and go before you know it, same with the food
Everybody in the room is already hitting the BAWLS
The lights go out and the glow gives me the goose bumps
IT’S TIME TO BE THE LAST MAN STANDING!
5…….4……..3………2…….1

IT’s Game Day!
8)
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Offline ZWarrior

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« Reply #6 on: May 03, 2002, 12:28:35 PM »
Nice post, but there is on thing that's wrong in there.  Spade_jr has NEVER made fun of my hair.  Mainly because I have so little, but still. ;)
--------------------------------
Zoë: Shepard, isn't the Bible kind of specific about killing?
Book: Very specific. It is, however, somewhat fuzzy around the area of kneecaps.

Offline Spade

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« Reply #7 on: May 03, 2002, 02:10:14 PM »
You know your right about that one, It must of been Zeet and Wolverine :sleep:
We all know Rogue was gaming in his pajama's so a shower for him was...?????:drummer:
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Offline Wolverine of Ambush!

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« Reply #8 on: May 03, 2002, 04:32:36 PM »
Brings...t..t...tears..to my eyes..:(   That was such a beautiful tribute.  :hippy:

P.S. I'll wear a hat from now on. (Good thing his daddy was there...or I would have kicked that little punk kid in the shin! ) :lol
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Offline n1c

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« Reply #9 on: May 04, 2002, 10:15:02 PM »
Dragon Master was fast asleep :sleep: in his den dreaming about the long day ahead of him.  Man, I’m going to get a lot of souvenirs tomorrow, it’s going to be frag tastic!!! :evil
Then suddenly he was awakened by the crack of a branch outside his cave.  Oh no, they found the Dragons Nest.  Dragon got up as quietly as he could and hunched over in the corner, as the not-so-famous Wolverwussy came in with his flack cannon raised ready to fire.  Wolverwussy said “Man, its dark in here.”  Just then, Dragon stepped out of the shadows and said, “You want a light” Wolverwussy was so startled that he dropped his flack cannon and wet his yellow Tutu :eek.  Wolverwussy stared in fear for a few seconds and the fled as Dragon blew a large flame at him, lighting Wolverwussy Tutu on fire. Dragon Laughed so hard his gut started to hurt. :lol Well, Dragon thought, that’s a nice start to the day.
So, Dragon trudged on into the forest which leads to the city where he was sure to encounter ZWarrior, Zeet, some chick named Rouge, the spade (he is probably at the seminary digging his grave), and that’s where Wolverwussy ran off too also.
At the edge of town the sweet smell of blood was in the air, Dragon loved the smell of fresh blood on a cool morning it made his adrenalin start to pump into his vanes.
Then, he saw movement in the corner of his eye.  In the building to Dragons’ right Zeet was waking up from his slumber.  Dragon quickly teleported up on the roof, creped down the stares and into the room where he had seen him. Dragon heard water running in the bathroom.  Dragon thought to himself “Hum, how should I go about doing this… I know! Ill toss my translocater into the room right behind him and break his neck with my fingers. So, Dragon tossed the teleported into the room and zap! “OH NO!  That stupid Zeet thought it was a bug and tried to smash it with his foot right when I teleported” said Dragon.  He was mad, all he wanted to do was have some fun… Oh well, off to find ZWarrior and kick his butt around for a wile…… :evil


[Edited on 5-7-2002 by Dragon Master]
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Offline opiesilver

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« Reply #10 on: May 06, 2002, 02:04:21 AM »
Opie was startled.  It wasn't normal to see fire billowing out of a cave like that.  It could only mean one thing, someone had awakened the Dragon.  

He crept up near the cave and climbed up a rather large pine to get a better view.  Just as he got to a spot from where he could get a good look, he saw a sight that made his day.  It was a flaming Wuss.

"Man, that's got to hurt" Opie murmured.  Then Opie started to laugh.  Not having all his wits about him since the doc's put that metal plate into his head, Opie couldn't stop laughing and fell out of the tree.  It was just in time to see the Wuss running by flapping at the burning tutu.  Too bad he didn't see that tree in front of him.

"I got to help him out" Opie thought.  "I know, I'll put the fire out."  Opie walks up to the burning Wuss and starts to pee all over him.  Wuss started screaming in agony again and thrashing about as if he was still on fire.  And maybe he was, for you see, the evil Opie decided to put the fire out and put a bit of salt into his wounds.

Wuss just wouldn't stop screaming and it was beginning to annoy Opie.  "Shut up, you scum sucking little moron!"  "You think this is pain?" Opie pauses for a breath, "I'll show you what pain is!"  Opie picks his favorite impact hammer and thoughtfully puts it on stun.  He lowers it to the Wuss nose and pulls the trigger.    The hammer explodes out the back side of Wuss' skull.  "Damnit, I just wanted to have a little fun.  Maybe I should read the manual someday."
:sword:

[Edited on 5-6-2002 by opiesilver]
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Offline Spade

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« Reply #11 on: May 09, 2002, 10:21:59 AM »
Opie, I noticed you edited your post and removed the part of the story where Spade being the team player that he is had zoomed in on the Opie as he was in the tree and was just about ready to pull the trigger when Opie jumped down to help out my flamming team mate Wolverine.  Just as Opie was starting to put the salt on is when the story changed.
Spade had followed the Opie in his scope and when I heard the scream of my team mate is when I knew Opie wasn't helping at all but tormenting the Great Wolverine.
It was then that I pulled the trigger and stopped the pain.  I can only hope that you didn't need that extra little finger that lay on the ground in front of you.  We also won't have to worry about your Pee problem anymore.  :rpg:
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Offline ZWarrior

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« Reply #12 on: May 09, 2002, 10:37:50 AM »
A rock rolls away, and reveals a large turret gun.  Behind it is ZW, grinning.

"You messed up my cheese dip!!!" He screams then pulls the trigger.

Wolverine disappears in a mist red and yellow spandex, followed by Spade with his trusty shovel.

"All done!"

The rock slides back into position.
--------------------------------
Zoë: Shepard, isn't the Bible kind of specific about killing?
Book: Very specific. It is, however, somewhat fuzzy around the area of kneecaps.

Offline Spade

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« Reply #13 on: May 09, 2002, 10:58:57 AM »
I think your in a different game again Z.  You must of imagined a rock that rolls and a turret gun that you could shoot.  Oh Well hat's off for good imagination! 8)
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Offline Wolverine of Ambush!

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« Reply #14 on: May 09, 2002, 11:18:30 AM »
:rolling:rolling:rolling:rolling:rolling:rolling:rolling:rolling:rolling:rolling:rolling:rolling
Class is in Session.  Get ready to be schooled! :hat:

Offline ZWarrior

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« Reply #15 on: May 09, 2002, 01:41:47 PM »
:swear:
--------------------------------
Zoë: Shepard, isn't the Bible kind of specific about killing?
Book: Very specific. It is, however, somewhat fuzzy around the area of kneecaps.

Offline n1c

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« Reply #16 on: May 09, 2002, 01:56:33 PM »
its a dubble redemmer
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Offline Spade

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« Reply #17 on: May 09, 2002, 03:02:49 PM »
Was that Double?? :beer:
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Offline Wolverine of Ambush!

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« Reply #18 on: May 09, 2002, 05:09:22 PM »
Was that redeemer?:beer:
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Offline n1c

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« Reply #19 on: May 09, 2002, 07:10:16 PM »
Shudup:cry::cry::(
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Offline opiesilver

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« Reply #20 on: May 12, 2002, 01:42:50 PM »
Chaos UT rocks!:buttrock:
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Offline n1c

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« Reply #21 on: May 12, 2002, 11:18:26 PM »
can we get back to the story now??????
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Offline ZWarrior

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« Reply #22 on: May 13, 2002, 02:37:32 PM »
The fog begins to roll in...
--------------------------------
Zoë: Shepard, isn't the Bible kind of specific about killing?
Book: Very specific. It is, however, somewhat fuzzy around the area of kneecaps.

Offline Spade

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« Reply #23 on: May 21, 2002, 11:30:44 PM »
Well said Z!
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Offline Morpheus

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« Reply #24 on: May 28, 2002, 01:16:39 PM »
..there is a wavering of the air as Morpheus translocates beside Zeet.  Click goes the translocator, KABLAM! the flack cannon makes swiss cheese out of the sniping chicken.  Before he even has a chance to warn his team, Morpheus has translocated inside the fort.  RA-TA-TA-TA-TAT! ZWarrior is weighed down with 100 pounds of chain gun ammo.  Click woosh Spade materializes making a lovely corpse out of OpieSilver.

Meanwhile, Wolverine is bounding back to our fort with the flag.  However, whatever his Dragon name is this game, has snuck in a grabbed our flag.  He thinks he can hold on until the Z boys (Zeet and ZWarrior) can rescue their flag....CRACK Dragon Breath's head goes flying across the plain as Morpheus snipes from the other side of the map.  SWOOSH Spade  Jr. returns the flag and..... Bomp Bomp Bomp Beta Scores again!


Others don't even dream of working this well as a team!! :beer::love::wavey:
Luck is better than skill anyday! The more skill I get, the luckier I get!